There comes a time when you take stock and reflect on the life that you have lived. You look at the experiences that you have had, the compromises that you have made and the decisions that you have had to live through and the company you have chosen to keep. For some reason, these reflective moment tend to accompanied by a significant life changing event such as a death, a new job, or moving to a different city, a new baby or a fill in the blank. It doesn’t really matter what it is. The point is somewhere in your life, cognitive dissonance takes places and you are forced to look at what was, question it and to consider letting in the new.
1. Getting Older Is Liberating
One thing that really has a powerful lasting impact for many, is simply aging. Whether it turns out as a liberating or depressing experience, is on you. Getting older does something special to you, getting older softens you and hardens you at the same time. Getting older forces you to re-evaluate all that you have known as the truth, to scrutinize it, question it and to come up with your own conclusions. Aging exposes that things aren’t always what we were told they were. This revelation makes one realize and wish that they had reached this moment of actualization when they were a lot younger. But, here we are. So it’s all good.
2. It’s Really Not That Deep
Everything is a big deal when we are younger right! Everything we do or don’t do is going to be the end of us right? Ummm, what about, maybe not. I mean granted that’s what we have known and practiced for the longest time and we have seen people around us do the same thing, and so it was natural to mimic what we saw around us when we were younger. However, with age, you quickly realize that it’s not that deep! It’s not that final. It’s not always such a big deal.
You comprehend that your life is not about to end because he didn’t call or that you didn’t get that job you wanted. You realize that your presence on this planet is not really being threatened. When you take the time to unpack the situation you recognize that, actually “I have the coping skills to do deal with this rather ‘seemingly’ augmented scenario.” More so, if you don’t have the skills you know someone who does.
3. It’s Your Reality at the End of the Day, That’s What Matters
Reality is perception, how you perceive the situation is what will determine your outcome. Not everything is a big deal nor does it need to be made into a big deal. Not everything is urgent. Not everything is a game changer. Weigh it out and ask yourself, “And if it doesn’t pan out the way I want it to, will my life be over?” Most of the time, if you are honest with yourself, you will recognize that your answer to that will be a big fat “Hell no! I will be more than okay.” So calm down.
4. People Will Treat You the Way You Treat Yourself
When we are younger we are sometimes victims of circumstance because everything that is happening around us feels so gigantic and out of reach and that people treat us a certain way and that there is nothing we can do about it. It makes sense, we were young, no one is to blame and we coped with the world the best way we knew how to.
With age though, you will come to learn that if you keep giving people permission to treat you are a certain way, whether you are conscious of your actions or not, people will respond to what you give them. If you show people that you are a walk over and don’t really like making decisions, for example, they will over time, walk all over you and make decisions for you. This may sound farfetched but just look at the relationships around you. What do you see?
5. Show People How You Want To Be Treated
You see, when people see you treating yourself a certain way they subconsciously make the link that he/she must like or want to be treated this way, so, therefore, they honor your wish. Treat yourself well. With love, respect, confidence and with a high regard and see the type of people you will attract into your life. People will mirror what you put out consciously or subconsciously.
6. Confidence Is a State Of Mind
That’s right! You have to feel sexy before you become sexy. People will see right through you. It’s how you carry yourself and how you feel about yourself that makes all the difference. Do you walk into the room timid and looking for a corner to hide in or do you walk in with your head held high, making eye contact and do not try to disappear into the walls? Both of these examples will leave you feeling a certain way and will leave the people around you perceiving you are a certain way. Choose the best feeling outcome.
7. Enough with Giving Your Power Away
When you get older you realize that the situations or people that used to intimidate you don’t do so anymore because a part of the reason why they had so much power over you is because you gave them the power and they didn’t hesitate to use it. You made them seem bigger and better than you were, but in all honesty, that power had been residing in you, dormant, waiting to unleashed. Once you reclaim your power back and really own it, you quickly grasp that you can truly have and become what you want. If you feel and remain powerless, you are robbing yourself of the life you deserve.
Growing up is wonderful folks! It really is! It gives you much-needed perspective and hindsight. However, wouldn’t it be nice if you knew what you know now earlier? The biggest change that takes place between your younger self and your older self is a change in perspective. A fresh new outlook. The realization that you are more in control than you thought you actually were. Once you come to terms with this truth and come to the realization that how you think and feel about something is exactly how you will experience it, your life changes.
Remember, it’s really not that deep. Truth is, you don’t have to wait to get older to live your best life, start now. Use the wisdom and nuggets from those who have walked the path before you and just be fabulous! So take it easy, kick back and enjoy the journey.